How To Get Out Of Your Own Way

Sometimes you just have to get out of your own way. Or, more specifically, out of your mind. As someone who has been out of my mind more often than I care to admit, I understand how sometimes your mind can mess with your head. And your goals. And especially your dreams.

One of the things I learned as a brand new martial arts student was how to get out of the way of an attack. And I was really, really good at it. My technique of choice was to cover my head with my gi top and run off the mat screaming, “Don’t touch me!” Ah, yes. Those were the good old days.

Eventually I was able to get out of my head and into my body to stay engaged with my attacker and gracefully step out of the way. Soon after that, I was able to step back into my attacker and take him down. It was a slow and tedious process for me, but once I let go of my preconceived  conviction that I was going to get beaten to a pulp, magic slowly began to unfold.

Not only did I learn to get out of an attacker’s line of fire, I learned how to get out of my own way as well. Because it’s that negative self-talk, the fear that we are either going to fail, look stupid, be ridiculed, or fall on our face. Huh, been there, done that. All of the above. And yet I survived.

I have to be honest, and I have to confess that I still struggle with getting out of my own way, especially when a remarkable opportunity presents itself. And it recently did, but I’m not quite ready to talk about it quite yet. I’m still trying to wrap my head around it and wonder what I had gotten myself into.

But if we don’t keep reaching for new heights, think of all the incredible experiences we might miss out on. And that would just be sad, don’t you think?

Episode 11: Change Your Mind, Change Your Life

The ability to change our mind is our God-given right. But happens when you change your mind, or more specifically, your mindset? The results can be miraculous, and this miracle of nature is in each and every one of us.

It is called neuroplasticity, which simply means that our brain, body, and nervous system can change during the course of our entire lifetime. We are capable of interrupting habits and patterns which may not be serving us well, and causing pain or dysfunction. We can actually change the way we move, think, feel, and sense. Which sounds like a no-brainer (pun intended).

However, as recently as twenty-five years ago, conventional wisdom was that this neuroplasticity disappeared around the age of fourteen. Which is really crazy when you think about it. Because there are many modalities that have been around for decades and even centuries that have accessed this neuroplasticity to help millions of people improve their physical, mental, and emotional level of function. A few examples are Feldenkrais, Pilates, yoga, martial arts, acupuncture, massage, and meditation. The list goes on and on.

Download this episode to discover how you can tap into this brain power simply by changing your mind, and how to apply it to every single aspect of your life including health, fitness, finances, relationships, business, and more. With the right mindset, you’ll be amazed at what you can accomplish!

Don’t Fear the 5-0

A lot of my young friends are getting ready to turn the big 5-0. Meh-heh-heh. I laugh because none of them seem very happy about it. As a matter of fact, some of them even act like it’s the end of the world. As a deliriously happy person over fifty, all I can say to them is “Buck up, Buttercup!”

Turning 50 is NOT the end of the world. As far as I’m concerned, turning 50 was the best thing that ever happened to me. To be honest, my 30s were a bit of a nightmare. My 40s were even worse. There were times I didn’t even think I would make it to 50, and neither did a lot of my friends.

But, for some reason, I figured if I could make it to the big 5-0, maybe things would get better. For once in my life I was right. It was almost like magic happened. I felt like I was finally comfortable in my own skin. The nagging and sabotaging negative self-talk that plagued me all of my adult life finally fell silent. Don’t get me wrong–it still does rear its ugly head every now and again. But at least I recognize it before it gets out of control and I can tell it to kindly shut up and mind its own business. In a loving way, of course.

Once I hit 50, I felt happier, more content, and less stressed over the little things. I learned that it was okay to walk away from “friendships” that weren’t working for me. I learned to like myself more, and to be my own best friend. My 50s were so great that when the big 6-0 came creeping up on me, I ran toward it with arms open wide, ready to embrace whatever came next.

So, if you are turning 50 soon, stop worrying about it. It will give you frown lines, and laugh lines are far more attractive. Besides, the best is yet to come. Embrace it.

Where’s Your Tipping Point?

I heard the most fascinating story a few weeks ago. A friend of mine was leaving work early to rush off to an afternoon ballet class. It had just begun to snow, even though it was late spring. That happens a lot in Colorado.

When she put her key in the ignition, a snowflake gracefully floated down from the sky and landed squarely in a chip on her windshield. As soon as that snowflake touched down, the entire windshield shattered. From one harmless little snowflake!

She sat there in shock, trying to figure out what just happened. How could one delicate little frozen drop of water shatter an entire windshield? In her own words, she said, “If I hadn’t seen it for myself, I never would have believed it.” At least she wasn’t driving at the time. So, instead of going to ballet class, she (carefully) drove off to get her windshield replaced.

Two days later, she shared her story with us. We all marveled at the power of one tiny little snowflake. We speculated what conditions must have existed for that to happen. Was it temperature related? Did the snowflake have the identical size, shape, and dimensions of the chip which caused it to shatter? Are the properties of glass not as solid as we think? Or, was it merely a bizarre coincidence? What was the tipping point?

The truth is, we all have a tipping point. Everything in nature does. And, as I learned in my martial arts training, water can take down a mountain. So it makes perfect sense that it can also shatter a windshield.

Like everyone else, I’ve hit a tipping point multiple times in my life. Sometimes we feel like we’re out on a ledge, ready to go off a cliff. Other times it takes us completely by surprise. But how we react to these life changing events is what counts. The important thing is to stay positive, resilient, and learn from the experience.

So….where’s your tipping point?

 

 

 

 

 

Age Is a Beautiful Thing

Age is a beautiful thing. Or, at least it can be, as long as you have the right attitude. I recently saw an advertisement for a clinic specializing in “Age Management Medicine.” Yikes! As if getting older is a disease state that needs to be managed. That certainly puts a negative spin on getting older. It’s also ridiculous, and it simply isn’t true.

What we believe is what we become. What we tell ourselves and what we hear from other people is what we eventually believe, even if it conflicts with our inherent belief system. I personally believe that we can all be fit, healthy, and vibrant, in every stage of life. Because what we believe is what we become.

It all begins with the right mindset. Staying positive, and blocking out some of the negative messages we hear from society, the media, even our friends and family is a great place to start. And pay attention to the people around you who are fabulous examples and role models that age isn’t something to be “managed.” It’s a beautiful process to be celebrated and enjoyed.

My favorite ballet teacher and mentor is still going strong and teaching six days a week at 71. Her energy and enthusiasm is boundless. I have a long time friend who bellies up to the barre with me at least four days a week for a professional level ballet class. She is 81, and she is amazing! My vibrant, energetic, and beautiful Aunt Stella was recently featured in her local newspaper for her remarkable accomplishments in bowling. She is 89 years young. Her youthful vitality is delightful to see, and she is an incredible role model. Not just for me, but for everyone who meets her.

Age is a number, not a disease. Getting older is inevitable. Getting old is a choice. At least, that’s what I believe. And, what we believe is what we become.

Attitude is Everything: In Fitness and In Health

Attitude is everything, in everything we do. When I was a little girl, I remember watching the incredible story of Peter Pan on TV. Parts of it was magical, and parts of it was downright terrifying. But, the one scene that really impressed me was when Peter taught John, Wendy, and Michael how to fly.

Peter certainly had a point when he was teaching the children how to fly. To reach their goal, all they had to do was to think lovely thoughts. Without the right mindset, they were grounded. But with the right mental attitude, the sky was the limit, so to speak.

Even after all these years, I can still recall that scene in my mind. The memory of that scene and Peter Pan’s advice has helped me get through a lot of challenging times and difficult situations over the years. After all, the only thing you need to achieve your goals is the right attitude, and to think lovely thoughts.

Many years ago, when my parents were visiting me and my husband, we were flipping through the television channels looking for something to watch. Something we could all agree on. Good luck with that. As my husband was channel surfing, he came across a station that had just started airing Peter Pan, the same one with Mary Martin that I had fallen in love with when I was a very small child.

My mother and I involuntarily squealed with delight. My father and husband groaned in disappointment. The negotiations began, but in the end, my mom and I won out. Peter Pan it was.

For the first time in almost 25 years, I got to watch Peter Pan teach John, Wendy, and Michael how to fly. And I was reminded to think lovely thoughts, no matter what life happens to throw at you. It’s so much better for your health, fitness, and well-being. When you think lovely thoughts, just imagine what you can accomplish in every aspect of your life–in your fitness, your health, relationships, business, etc. The sky’s the limit. You might even learn how to fly.

Mirror Neurons on the Wall….Mirror Neurons make You Smile

Mirror neurons on the wall….mirror neurons make you smile. This is a twist from one of the scariest fairy tales I’ve ever heard, Sleeping Beauty. But, what are mirror neurons, and why are they important?

They’re important because we have a tendency to mirror behavior that we observe. Imagine that you are having a bad day, and you come across someone who flashes you a radiant smile. Even though you may be carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders, the natural tendency is to smile back. Immediately your mood is lighter. You feel like your load has been lifted a bit, and all of a sudden your day just got better.

It’s not simply because someone smiled at you that lifted your spirits. When you see someone smile, there are neural pathways in your brain that are activated. These pathways cause you to experience the same emotion that the other person is feeling.

On the other hand, if you’re in a fabulous mood, a scowl from a perfect stranger can ruin your day before you even know what’s happening. Mirror neurons are really pretty cool, because it helps us instantaneously understand what other people are feeling. It’s a great way to communicate with perfect strangers, and it helps us be more empathetic.

However, we need to be mindful of this little magic trick that nature has provided for us. While it is important to be able to connect with people at every level, if you surround yourself with people who are negative, critical, or judgmental, it’s just a matter of time before you will feel exactly the way they do. And you’ll behave that way as well. Conversely, if you surround yourself with positive people, you will lift each other up and the positive energy is self-perpetuating. It’s a beautiful thing.

So, make a habit of surrounding yourself with positive people. And the next time you see someone who looks like they’re having a bad day, please give them a warm smile. make sure it starts with your eyes and comes from your heart. You’ll light up their mirror neurons and brighten their day. You might even change their life. All from mirror neurons that make you smile. Isn’t that amazing?